Walk On Podcast Episode 49 : Let’s Talk About Sex, Baby!

My first orgasm was my first meditation. It was my first venture into self-discovery. It was my first secret with myself. It was my first connection to the sacred and the divine. Growing up in the Bible Belt complicated this connection. The shame at being a perceived girl and a sexual being at the same time was programmed in me early and often. This contributed to my being closeted, being afraid of my sexuality, and feeling “bad” for being curious.

Over the course of my journey through this life so far, I have encountered so many unique expressions of sex and sexuality that the spectrum of experience truly seems infinite. So why are we told there is one way, and one way only, to be?

You guessed it, kids!! It’s another program.

Separating us from pleasure—praising those that can deny themselves as more moral and demonizing those that don’t as less moral is the way that shame creeps in. This isn’t just in regards to sex. Think about the pleasure of rest, the pleasure of eating, the pleasure of enjoying life in literally any capacity. Even the pleasure of loving oneself is something that inspires judgment in others. We are not supposed to enjoy ourselves. We are not supposed to find ourselves. We are not supposed to become ourselves. Why?

Well, because then we don’t need a bunch of products to fill the void. Because then we don’t hate ourselves and bully each other into the mind-aching monotony of conformity. Because then we find healing and don’t feel the need to perpetuate the generational cycle of suffering that we inherited from those who came before us. Think of the “I paid my student loans so everyone should have to!!” people. Yikes!

Doing something you don’t want to do or being forced to pretend to be something you aren’t is a violation of consent. And consent is obligatory for pleasure. The comfort and safety of the ownership of one’s own being is healing on infintessimal cellular and cosmic levels. Let’s give each other the gift of acceptance, understanding, and open-mindedness, cuz that’s love.

Everyone's individual expression of sexuality is completely unique to them. We are all tuning forks for the Universe, emitting our own frequency, and that's good! When someone tells you who they are, believe them--celebrate them, rejoice in the freedom of their authenticity!!! If someone changes their mind, that's great too!! We are ever-expanding!! Lay down your judgments and preconceptions and just be. Embracing pleasure and the pleasure of self-expression is an act of revolution. That's why its such a threat to the status quo. That's why we're taught to deny ourselves. Fuck that. Be free.